I watched Game of Thrones for the first time last night. And no, I haven’t read any of the books, either.
I was, predictably, completely and utterly confused. Why didn’t the wolf eat the guy? Why did they kill the innocent baby? Was it really necessary to show the brothel in action?
I mean, it’s HBO, so the answer to that last question is pretty obvious. But the rest of them, probably not show much.
Anyway, one of the underlying plots of Game of Thrones seems to involve people traveling from one place to another. And yet, there’s little explanation for why one would travel from one place to the next, and even less explanation as to where the hell they’re actually going.
Fortunately, unlike those poor folks on our television screen last night, we have the internet. Frankly, I believe that if they had the internet back in Game of Thrones time, they wouldn’t have had to travel, thereby ruining half the plot of the show and pretty much ensuring that it would never be such a smashing success. They also might have discovered DNA testing and could thereby spare the murders of countless, innocent children. But I digress.
Alas, no internet spawns more traveling and more traveling spawns more map-making. Thanks to these bad boys, now you can have a better idea as to just who’s going where and why.
Here’s more on Game of Thrones from the LA Times:
It’s a rare, shining moment of joy in an episode where nearly everyone is half-broken and hanging on by the skin of their teeth, and things seem far likely to get worse before they get better. The once-united Seven Kingdoms have fractured into numerous factions, and teeter on the brink of all-out civil war thanks to the untimely deaths of King Robert and Ned Stark and the growing number of would-be lieges who have forged their own crowns.
Robb Stark has declared himself King in the North after the death of his father at the hands of child-monster King Joffrey, the 13-year-old sociopath currently sitting on the Iron Throne like a kid burning ants with the world’s largest magnifying glass. Joffrey is a character who has grown so loathsome that it’s occasionally difficult to get through his scenes without taking a break to watch that immensely satisfying fan video where Tyrion slaps him on loop for ten minutes, which I highly recommend.