The left wing has been accusing the right of waging a war on women for a while now, citing their stance on contraception availability and the general Stepford-esque utopian values so many conservative pundits strive to instill in America. Not so fast, Lefty Lou. You’re the phallic terrorist. So says Mitt Romney anyway. On last night’s episode of “The Colbert Report,” Stephen Colbert addressed the liberal fabrication, comparing it to other mythical nonsense like “global warming and the female orgasm.”

I knew that stuff was made up. So how is Romney trying to spin the current paradigm? He has been criticized for being generally unlikeable and a recent poll shows women voters strongly prefer Obama.

Here’s a clip from last night’s episode:

Herman Cain, what are you still doing? I thought you rode off into the sunset on a hover board, eating pizza and slapping any ass you so happen to pass by. Apparently not. Let’s just ignore you.

Romney claims that “the real war on women” has been caused by Obama’s failed economic policy.

How so, Mitt?

“Over 92% of the jobs lost under this president were lost by women,” said Romney.

“That’s called flipping the script, baby,” said Colbert.

Thankfully, the world is home to some real savvy fact checkers. Some of them work at The Washington Post. So what did they find about Romney’s claims.

They found that it is essentially “true but false.”

Wait, what?

“Thank you, Washington Post,” said Colbert. “Your reporting was helpful, but useless.”

Then there is the democratic strategist who claimed Ann Romney “has never worked a day in her life.”

Conservative media pounced on the quote in a manner not unlike a child with a pocket full of rocks blaming his brother for the broken window.

The quote was stupid. It was insensitive.

But come on, now. You have Rush Limbaugh on your team.